¤ Yuugiou Quotes ¤

Major thanks to The Yu-Jyo Episode Guide, the awesome players of domino_uni, and the members of playthedamncard and Janime's forum.

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"The so-called 'heart of darkness' that you speak of... You have shown this to Mokuba and I for long enough! The depths beyond the depths of the heart of darkness we didn't want to see! We have overcome all of this and have come this far! What is in my heart... is the light that will carve out our future! That is all we need!"
~ Seto, to Dartz, Japanese anime

"It's easy to give up, to give in when things get tough, but that's not the way to win. I won't quit, no matter how hopeless it seems! That's not the way to get ahead, either in Duel Monsters or in life!"
~ Yami, English anime

"Looks like a regular old briefcase to me."
"It's in the briefcase, you moron."
~ Joey/Seto, English anime

"Jounouchi-kun, daisuki da (I love you)..."
~ Yuugi, Japanese anime

"Once a person conjures up the confidence not to be fearful of the unknown, he disarms the only weapon the dark has!"
~ Yami, English anime

"I will not lose my grip on reality!"
~ Seto, English anime

"I want to stay with you always, aibou, even if I don't get my memories back."
~ Yami, Japanese anime, taken from Yu-Jyo Episode Guide

"If Malik has the power to control minds, then he probably turned Jounouchi into a mean dog that will bite you. I would..."
~ Seto, Japanese anime, while in the helicopter with Yami before his duel with Marik-controlled Joey, taken from Yu-Jyo Episode Guide

While Marik is giving Ra to Yami after their duel:
"Make sure it's not the fake one."
"Joey!!"
~ Joey/Tea, English anime

"Live each day like it is your last, for one day you are sure to be right."
~ Pegasus, English anime

"Kisara, that destructive light also pierced my soul. The thing that pierces my heart is the sadness of losing my true light. Kisara, forgive me. The only thing that locked you up was the dungeon that is my heart. You sparked the speck of light to my soul which was slowly being eaten by darkness. That was not from the spirit that resides inside you. Kisara, it was your own light."
~ Priest Seto, Japanese anime

"You may not believe in destiny, but before this tournament is done, you will have to face your past..."
"Y'know, I read that once in a fortune cookie."
~ Ishizu/Seto, English anime

"Hey, look at Marik! He's so scared, his hair is standing up!"
~Joey, English anime, after Yami plays Obelisk

"What is power? Power is the thing that I live on. On the field, you don't have partners. Other players are your enemies. Power is used to defeat the enemy and for protecting your reign. Power is to use for yourself. The power of cooperation... can this power overtake what I believe in?"
~ Seto, Japanese anime, taken from Yu-Jyo Episode Guide

"Let's play a game... If you've got any guts!"
~ Yami, English manga

"When fighting with you, my spirit and strength are pushed to the limit! Your existence excites and thrills me! But we don't need two kings in the world. I have to beat you with my own hands!"
~ Seto, to Yuugi/Yami, Japanese anime, taken from the Yu-Jyo Episode Guide

"Kaiba, your power is from hatred. That power is very weak. Hatred and anger... isn't the weight of victory too heavy for you?"
~ Yami, Japanese anime, taken from the Yu-Jyo Episode Guide

"That was the day I took control of my future."
"Yeah? Well, it was also the day you stopped calling me 'Moki.'"
~ Seto/Mokuba, English anime

"The strength of the duelist is faith in the potential of victory. Victory depends on whether or not the duelist has the courage to fight until the bitter end."
~ Yami, Japanese movie

"I transcend logic!"
~ Seto, English anime

"I used to create virtual copies of myself to duel against all the time."
"Why duel yourself?"
"Who better?"
~ Seto/Tristan, English anime

"Jounouchi... in your scattered state... I finally recognize you as a duelist."
~ Seto, Japanese anime

"Jackpot..."
~ Yami, Japanese movie

"Leave the young one out of this!"
~ Yami, warning Yami Bakura to keep his hands off of Yuugi, English anime

"Yuugi -- my lifelong rival -- are you being weak here? The cards of our souls... the time to give up hasn't come. Our possibility is sleeping in the cards. Fight, Yuugi. Believe in our deck."
~ Seto, Japanese anime, taken from Yu-Jyo Episode Guide

Joey: "Here goes." *points to doors in circle* "One potata, two potata, three potata four! Five potata, six potata..." *continues*
Kaiba: "How did that fool make it so far?" *goes in another door* "Just pick a door, you geek!"
Joey: "I..choose..you! We have a winner!" *Marik goes in the door* "Hey! Hold it! I already called dibs on that door!"
Yami: "Just pick the door closest to you, Joey."
Joey: *pouts and goes in a door* "But what about my potata song?"
~ English anime

"Knowing him, he saved his mind in a backup file."
~ Yuugi, referring to Noa, English anime (OMGWTFBBQSAUZ. Stupid dub.)

"I am a human, not a machine."
~ Noa, to Mokuba, Japanese anime

"Let it be at an end, Father."
~ Noa, to Gozaburo, Japanese anime

*unsheaths his Rod-dagger over an unconscious Yuugi* "Should I slash him up right now?"
"What?!"
"Relax, I'm just kidding."
~ Yami Malik/Jounouchi, Japanese anime

"While you geeks were all sleeping, I was on the computer figuring out all the secrets to Ra!"
~ Seto, English anime

"You're here to guide and protect him?! Then protect him against this!!"
~ Yami Bakura, to Yami, English anime

"But I'd be destroying you, sending you to the card graveyard!"
"I don't care, it's better than being enslaved by an evil spirit. Do it!!"
~ Yuugi/Ryou, English anime

"This isn't a story about a special King... Everyone has a story, and this was a story that concluded in light... And my story has just begun!!"
~ Yuugi, the last words of the Yuugiou manga

"Who would have thought you even had a heart, let alone one so easily broken?"
~ Yami Bakura, to Pegasus, English anime

"The game... Ever shifting... New dangers surround every turn..."
~ Yami Bakura, English anime

"Don't worry, we still have my Great Outdoor Survival Guide!"
"Go ahead, Tristan, eat all the pages ya like!"
~ Tristan/Joey, English anime

"Let me go! I have something to do!!"
"We are already dead, Father..."
~ Gozaburo/Noa, Japanese anime

"My Barrel Dragon is going to blast your good intentions to dust."
~ Bandit Keith, to Joey, English anime

"OK, on three!"
"Three!!"
~ Joey/Tristan, English anime

"Now I know I'm nuts. I'm, like, six inches tall, wearing a dress, about to fight my giant friend?!?"
~ Joey, English anime

"Is that a monster or a dessert topping?"
~ Bakura, English anime

"I have got to hand it to your brother. This virtual sand, it tastes just like real sand."
~ Joey, to Mokuba, English anime

"Welcome to Loserville, Weevil! Population: You."
~ Joey, English anime

Yuugi: "Wow, there's chips ..."
Joey: "Dibs on the chips."
Yuugi: "Candy bars..."
Joey: "Dibs on the candy bars."
Yuugi: "Fruit..."
*silence*
Yuugi: "Soda..."
Joey: "Dibs on the soda."
~ English anime

"Hey, I got credentials, too, ya know!"
"Yeah, but on the other hand, you probably don't even know how to spell credentials."
~ Joey/Tristan, English anime

While discussing their new digital keychain pets:
Jounouchi: "Awright, Yuugi! Let's you and I mate right away!"
Yuugi: "Okay!"
Honda: *makes a face* "I didn't need to hear that."
~ Japanese manga

"That little hairball couldn't be an important step on the way to anything, except maybe choking a cat..."
~ Mai, referring to Yami's Kuribo, English anime

"Dork. Of course we're friends."
~ Mai, to Joey, English anime

"Destroy!! Destroy!! Destroy!! EVERYTHING!!!"
~ Yami Malik, Japanese anime

"Will someone please buy this girl a clue?!"
~ Tea, referring to Serenity, English anime

"Well, speak of the freak show."
~ Mai, English anime, commenting on the entrance of Yami Malik

"Know why he's grinning, Yuugi? Because this cat loves what he does, and does what he loves! This card can copy any one of your cards that I want!"
*Doppelganger wraps his body around Pegasus like a snake*
"Oh, sorry, any card that HE wants. So what card will it be this time, Doppelganger?"
*Doppelganger whispers in Pegasus's ear*
"Perfect, you always have the best ideas!"
~ Pegasus, English anime

"Me? Duel you? I'd have more of a challenge playing solitaire."
~ Seto, English anime

"Did you find out anything?"
"Yeah, I found out I hate virtual dogs."
~ Yuugi/Joey, English anime

"Consider this a message from the REAL Seto Kaiba: YOU LOSE!!!" *Mind Crush*
~ Yami, English anime

"I am not a freaky fish guy!"
~ Mako, English anime

Tristan: "Aren't you a little young to be out here all by yourself?"
Rebecca: "I'm eight!"
Joey: "Yeah, inches tall."
~ English anime

Tea: "I play the Petit Angel in attack mode!"
Joey: "What is that?"
Tristan: "Come on, Tea! That is not funny!"
~ English anime

"I'm just here to chew bubble gum and kick ass, and I'm all out of bubble gum."
~ Seto, Japanese Series 1 anime (reputed, but it's unsure if he ever said this)

"I figure I'm losing my mind, but I'm gonna go with it."
~ Joey, English anime

"Yuugi saved me... AGAIN!"
~ Seto, English anime

"The Blue Eyes White Dragon will bring victory; however, what the Red Eyes Dragon brings is not victory, but potential."
~ Shopkeeper lady, Japanese movie

"In memory of all I have lost, I fight on with all I possess."
~ Pegasus, English anime

"Shinjite iru (I trust you), mou hitori no boku.."
"AIBOU!!"
~ Yuugi/Yami, Japanese anime

"Wha-- Yuugi!! You can't-- This isn't a duel!!"
~ Yami, English anime

"I think I would have to file this under 'not good'..."
~ Joey, English anime, after seeing Yami Malik awaken

"Don't worry about it, Joey! This tournament was just a cheap way for Kaiba to promote Kaiba Land!"
"You know I'm standin' right here, right?"
~ Tristan/Mokuba, English anime

"How do ya like them apples?"
"Ah, that saying went out about fifty years ago. And while we're at it, so did those overalls."
~ Mr. Mutou/Joey, English anime

While running from a large rolling boulder:
"Now what?!"
"Break left!!"
*boulder runs Joey over*
"Your other left, Joey!!"
~ Joey/Tristan, English anime

"Don't touch the suit."
"I'll touch more than that!"
~ Siegfried/Joey, English anime

"By the expression on your face, I'm guessing my destiny looks pretty good."
~ Seto, to Siegfried, English anime

*wistful thought-voice* "If only Kaiba were able to see himself fighting boldly by my side..." ~ Atem, English anime

"So, the virtuous Mahaad(o) fights dirty?"
"You're just upset because my monsters have the upper hand!!"
~ Bakura/Mahaado, English anime

Quotes from fans and fanfics:

"In the Japanese, [Isis] asks [Kaiba] to accept the truth with an open heart. "Kudaran!" he says, which means "Ridiculous!" or "Nonsense!" It's one of Japanese Kaiba's favorite words."
~ Cody, Yu-Jyo Episode Guide

"Umbra summons Rogue Doll, a weak monster with only 1600 attack points. Kaiba makes fun of it, and Yuugi wonders what they're up to."
~ Cody, Yu-Jyo Episode Guide

"Look on the bright side. At least they didn't make Amelda a flat-chested girl. XD"
~ Shuuichi, Janime's forum

"Doesn't Yuugi's hair look kind of like a pot leaf?"
~ Ryuji Dicey, Janime's forum

While discussing Shinkanshipping:
"...I'm not even gonna bother wondering who's seme."
~ Rabid Fangirl, Janime's forum

"If the fairies are nude and the violence quite frequent,
Gunshots get fired and there’s perversion (indecent!),
There’s great music, and death is not put under the lid,
Then I’d have to say what you’re watching is not from 4Kids."
~ darkmalik2, Livejournal, in an article written for Sennen Rage

"If I were you, I’d take that stupid looking thing off and nail it to a wall, give that parasite a few days to reflect on how difficult it is to move a piece of jewelry when one has no hands."
~ Seto, talking to Ryou about Yami Bakura, "From Darkness to Light" by Asher Tye, Fanfiction.net

"As for me, I had always taken risks, but they were measured and meant to serve my grim purposes. Racing with Kaiba furthered no goal, except to make me feel more intensely alive. I never knew my own mortality so surely as when I was with him; driving too fast, flying too low, diving from the cliffs of the Kaiba Mansion to the sea below. I had caught the exhilaration of speed, of shared danger, of shared trust. And it was as intoxicating as Kaiba himself."
~ Yami, "I Guess It Was in the Cards" by Nenya85, Akashic-Records.Kurayami.org

"The scene between Pegasus and Kaiba was the best part of the movie. Because I was reading subtext into everything, of course, but that doesn't change it being the best part.
Guys: *were having an argument on something or another*
Pegasus: Now now, Kaiba-boy, let's not get nasty. *pause, smirk* At least not yet.
*REALLY LONG PAUSE*
Kaiba: *snarl* Let's just duel.
rayemars: *dies*"
~ rayemars's review of Yu-Gi-Oh: Pyramid of Light, Livejournal

"I can tell you one thing. They know how to please the fangirls *big grin* I couldn't help but yell, "Seto!" when I saw the hand touch the duel disk in the preview of ep 218. And geez, where was Kaiba hiding that thing the whole time :p Guess he never leaves home without it...."
"*laughs* That's what the obnoxiously huge billowing trench coat is for: hiding well needed objects like briefcases, duel disks and the occasional little brother."
~ Shykid/mad_psyentist, Janime's forum

"First of all... Kaiba was awesome! Okay, so he wasn't drawn as well as he sometimes is. But ah well. He was pretty brave, running up to Zork like that. I mean, he didn't HAVE to help Yuugi/Atemu. And those kids that representing him and Mokuba, that was sad. I think they're the kids that ran through him when he first got into Egypt? But it was cool when Kaiba got all pissed and stood up to Zork ^^ He does have a soft side! That's why I love Kaiba ^^ "
~ Shykid, Janime's forum

The ultimate Egypt arc quote:
"This arc makes my head hurt."
~ DarkMorphmon, Janime's forum

"I started laughing within thirty seconds. I didn't stop, except when I felt the need to breathe. That's how great it was."
~ rayemars's thoughts on Yu-Gi-Oh: Pyramid of Light, Livejournal

"Visions of Yami at School
Teacher: Who is the current President of Egypt? Oh, Yami?
Yami: Why, Mrs. Smith, it's me!
Teacher: Um... No, it's...
Yami: Me!
Teacher: Young man, this is a classroom, not a comedy clu...
Yami: But, I AM the "President" of Egypt!
Teacher: -_-''
--
Gym Teacher: Okay, class, today we're playing football!
Yami: *thinking* Oh, Yuugi showed me this game on the picture box thing! This will be simple to win!
*2 minutes later *
Gym Teacher: YAMI!!! You're just supposed to tackle the person with with ball, not beat up every person on the other team!!!"
~ Janime's forum

"I felt so bad about Kisara. She got whored around SO much. Kaiba had her, Joey's had her, Kaiba offered her to Pegasus, Yami and Yuugi both had her... poor girl."
~ rayemars, Livejournal (Incidentally, he's referring to the Blue-Eyes card...)

"Yami's decision to make Yuugi his 'aibou' -- his partner -- rather than just the guy whose body he happens to use when he needs it -- isn't just a matter of 'well, it's his body, so I guess I ought to let him have some say in how I use it,' or, 'he's kind of clever sometimes so maybe he'll come in handy.' Instead, it's 'I need him. He's strong in ways that I'm weak. I'd better start paying attention to him.'"
~ Cody

"One thing we don't really see much of, since the story's being told from Yuugi's point of view, is exactly how Yami views himself and his presence in Yuugi's mind. We know that he has no memory of his past or who he was before being awakened from the Millennium Puzzle, but we don't really know who he thinks he *is.* The way they both call each other "the other me" tends to suggest that Yami sees himself not as a separate person, but a part of Yuugi. He doesn't just go off and do whatever he wants when he's in charge, he takes revenge on people who've hurt Yuugi or Yuugi's friends. So it seems reasonable that he does see himself as Yuugi's protector, and he would consider it a weakness in himself not to properly take care of his other self."
~ Cody

"Ra: 'I'm a giant chicken. Ph33r me.'"
~ Rabid Fangirl, Janime's forum

"Dubbed Yu-Gi-Oh-ness:
Guards: "What are these 'guns' of which you speak?"
Noa: "I will blast you with stun rays!"
Malik: "Then I will send your mind to the Shadow Realm!"
Pegasus: "And then we will all celebrate with a nice, nonalcoholic glass of fruit juice!"
~ Janime's forum

"Yu-Gi-Oh! dub drinking game! Take a drink whenever Yami or Yuugi says "The fate of the world depends on it!" or "It's our destiny!" You won't stay sober for long...."
~ Cody, Yu-Jyo Episode Guide

"Joey, Yuugi, and Mokuba have scoured the town, and not one of the card stands has the Niwatori card. Suddenly, Yuugi realizes what the old man meant about it being a prize card, and leads them to a poster announcing a contest offering a Niwatori card as the prize to a warrior who can defeat the coliseum's champion. (And, even though the writing on the Japanese poster is just a bunch of scribbles, it's still redrawn into different scribbles for the US.)"
Japanese version:

English version:

~ Cody, Yu-Jyo Episode Guide

"Miho: Okay, I've got something fun...
Kaiba: Great, Grape head's got an idea.
Otogi: Now we're done for...
Jou: Be prepared for donning pink tutus...
Honda: *Whacking Jou and Otogi over the head* Now go on Miho, dear.
Miho: I propose we do a Lord of the Rings play...
Yuugi: Yeah...uh, who plays who...?
Jou: I call Legolas.
Kaiba: Yuugi can be the dwarf."
~ Janime's forum

"Otogi: Apparently a lot of people seem to think you and Yami have a thing for each other.
Honda: Makes me wonder...I mean after all he's obsessed with Yuugi.
Jou: Protects him even when he says he doesn't like him.
Otogi: And seems really jealous when Yuugi hangs out with Jou.
*The trio look at each other with "hmmmm" expressions, then look at Kaiba.*
Kaiba: Don't even go there..."
~ Janime's forum

"Seto Kaiba: *glares at the Millennium Eye* '...What're you looking at?'
*hits the floor in a fit of hysterical laughter*"
~ touzouku_ou, Livejournal

"After TK kicked the sar... D; That big word that it's too early to spell, across the floor to Atemu..."
~ slashernevi, Livejournal

"Yuugiou really is the boys' version of Sailor Moon."
~ hales731, Livejournal

"As Seth would say, "Onward with ye crack!!" Or, something like that. *gigglesnort*"
~ moonlight_bay13, Livejournal

"Well, at least we know where Kaiba learned to twirl a pen."
~ robinterrae, Livejournal

"I wanted to ride the coffin. ...NOT LIKE THAT. I mean. Hop on it and make someone push me around and down stairs and stuff. wheee~ ..I need sleep. XD"
~ touzouku_ou, Livejournal

"Jou: So, Shaadi, use that Millennium... err... thing of yours to point us in the right direction! :D;
Shaadi: ....It's a Millennium Key. >:|
:gigglesnortdie:"
~ tani_chan, Livejournal

"Yami: Er...hi?
Masses: OMGWEWORSHIPJ00 *fall to their knees*"
~ chibipriestess, Livejournal

"Am I the only one who saw the blatant sexual tension between Mahaado and Isis over the last couple of eps? :x;;"
"Yea, it's beyond obvious Isis has a thing for Mahad...o..."
~ flyingpinkbunny/mouhitorinosai, Livejournal

"I was seriously expecting Anzu to pop out there when Mana called her birdie. :|;
Mana: :whistes: ANZU~!
Anzu: :bird: 8D Tweet."
~ tani_chan, Livejournal

"Although I have grown quite fond of Black Magician with pale skin and lavender hair and those gorgeous blue eyes. Oh~! *clutches chest* Could steal your heart away, they could~"
~ touzouku_ou, Livejournal

"Puzzle = Mood Ring"
"Lovely. Now I'm picturing Joey staring as the walls turn pink. "Ehhh - tell me that don't mean what I think it means!" Yugi, glaring: No, actually, it doesn't! *mutters to himself about Joey's mind being in the gutter*"
"Yuugi would know."
~ shusu/spoke/me, Livejournal

"I was totally waiting for the big SPLAT but they took it out, and it did make me sad. D:"
~ hales731, Livejournal

"......Oh, god. That just made my insides clench, thinking of Mahaa.. maha.. Maha..do.. whatever, screaming as he got SLICED in HALF. and OMFG. *runs hysterically back and forth, screaming*"
~ touzouku_ou, Livejournal

"Mahaado: :sees all the BMs: ... :| Dammit.
Mana: :sees all the BMGs: D: WTH?!"
~ tani_chan, Livejournal

"He may have nice biceps, but he still has a goofy hat."
~ sdw, Livejournal, referring to Priest Seth

"I have to say that I love that really, card playing aside, the entire point of Battle City is to get Malik's shirt off. Now that's a worthy ambition!"
~ xparrot, Livejournal

"Yami can do math. Can we have Egypt now???"
~ shusu's thoughts on the final KC Grand Prix episode, Livejournal

"Anyway, my brother bought a new Fire Emblem game a few days ago. Seems the starting NPC that hangs out in your party or something is a fighter named Seth. He's tall, resembles Seto (not Seth as much) but has red hair, is super-powerful (keep killing bosses in one or two hits. XD) and is all protective of the main character. My brother and I keep giggling about it. XD"
~ amiasha, Livejournal

"Osiris/KC-Blimp. My OTP."
~ swanhawk, Livejournal

"Oh and also, I was watching the battle city episodes, the one they're showing on Cartoon Network and i noticed something.
Marik: Observe. *removes shirt*
Yami: *looks intrigued*
I was like "WTF?! I never noticed that before."
~ siriusaboutsev, Livejournal

"I bet you five Millennium Items that they edit Diabound's "tail" somehow."
~ the_sweet, Livejournal

"But wouldn't the combined force of their egos cause something to explode?"
~ elektra3, Livejournal, referring to Seto/Vivian

"The only tears I shed were the tears that came as a result of me LAUGHING MY ASS OFF."
~ cutiesaiyajin, Livejournal, referring to Siegfried's dub voice

"If Kaiba did a commercial like Yami did it'd be like 'Don't do drugs, because it'll turn you into an idiot. Or at least a bigger idiot than you undoubtedly already are.'"
~ irvys_sefie, Livejournal

"It aaaaaalways hurts to see little children dressed as Yami. My mom wonders if their parents know they're letting their kid dress up like a bondage-whore."
~ amiasha's thoughts on a Yami Halloween costume that's sold in stores, Livejournal

"Yay for people who like being way too analytical about things that make no difference whatsoever in the long run..." *glomps them and all their awesomeness*
~ box_of_doom, Livejournal

"They have to make up for the fact that Seto is currently ~~having a conversation with the Eye in his jet~~ on his way to Egypt and can't say his signature line."
~ robinterrae's thoughts on the "hologram" line, Livejournal

"Is anyone else really hot and bothered by claws-and-jaws at each other's throats, with Thief King on top?"
~ shusu, Livejournal

"I think Gozzy's secretly making babies with himself, and probably loving it too. He's his own bitch."
~ Tiggy

"Jounouchi was trying to be discreet, but for Jounouchi, that was kind of like trying to be purple."
~ "Best Friends," by Cody

"The phrase 'It's just a hologram' apparently needs to be mentioned at least once by anyone voiced by Eric Stuart. XD"
~ hpdigipokefan, Livejournal

"I know, he sounded like he had an awfully large booger up his nose."
~ silverwing147's thoughts on Honda's early Duelist Kingdom voice actor, Livejournal

"Everything I know about sex I learned from Yugioh fanfiction."
~ west_haven, Livejournal

"If I hear Kaiba make one more not-so-witty, smartass comment that he doesn't make in the original, I'm gonna kill people. :| "
~ shadowesque13, Livejournal

"HEY PHARAOH!! I AM WEARING YOUR HAT!! How does this make you feeel?!?!"
"...Are you? I have no recollection of it! :O!!"
"...Plan ruined. D:"
~ An imagined conversation between Marik and Yami, by _maiyuki_ on Livejournal

"This Christmas, the Ishtars had relocated from Egypt, and had brought with them the knowledge and the means to release the souls bound to the Millennium items and provide them with their own physical forms. A lot of deliberation and a little shadow magic later, Yami embraced Yugi for the first time, and Bakura finally stopped bitching about Ryou's choice of wardrobe."
~ "Wish", by whosjeebus, Livejournal

"It's just like "*molestclingcuddlemothermolest*" XD"
~ yaoipimp, Livejournal, describing an adorable doujinshi picture of young Bakura

"And as far as repetitive dialogue, every time he says 'I'll activate my spell card,' I get nervous."
~ Derry Sexton, Amazon.com review for Power of Chaos: Kaiba the Revenge

"'Oh, no, nothing's wrong, I just have a yami who's apparently capable of breaking into or out of any tomb ever constructed, evading any trap the human mind could ever conceive, has total command of the mystical realm of shadows, and yet--'
There was an agonized scream from inside the stall.
'--he can't master zippers.' Ryou finished bitterly."
~ "Make Like A Banana...," by Ochodre, FanFiction.net

"Bah! As if that baka can do anything besides take up space! And what the hell is it with him and tight leather! By Ra, he looks like he's wearing painted saran wrap!"
~ Bakura, "Side Stories to 'Snowed In,'" by insight-to-insanity, FanFiction.net

"The Odyssey by Homer, exspecially the movie. think about it for a while
Seto: I wish to return back to Kaiba Land and see my dear sweet Mokuba once again!
Later....
Seto: I'm finally back!
Mokuba: took you long enough, you were gone for 20 f*cking years!
Seto: I killed the big 5 ._.
~ yuehkitsune, Livejournal

Mistranslated quotes from the Yuugiou: Nightmare Troubadour game, courtesy of silverwing147 on Livejournal:
Namu: "My name in Namu."
Ishizu: "This make me happy."
Joey: "Woah. You've getting better and better."
Odion: "Master Ishizu."
Roland: "Congratulations on clearness."
Roland: "Information on various Duerist is input to the Duel Base by the technology of KaibaCorp."
Roland: "It challenges playing duel continuously in the Duel Base."
Seto Kaiba: "Next, when meeting, I win."
Seto Kaiba: "This victory is entrusted to you."
Tea: "Atmosphere badness is embarrassed somehow, but Bakura's been acting weird."
Yami Yugi: "He seemed to be obviously painful."
Yami Yugi: "The victory ceremony starts slowly. Let’s return!"
Yami Yugi: "Was it safe...you...? You were dueling in a Shadow Game with Marik. He can knock it down only by the Egyptian God Card. Moreover, take care when meeting Marik. Egyptian God Card is put in your deck. Then."
You: "I will not go out because slowness today."
You: "Let's already return."

"amazing how I go from 0 to porn in three seconds"
~ immicolia, Livejournal, referring to the writing of a Yuugiou fic

"I'll bet [Jesus]'d turn all of my water monsters into wine, just to be funny."
~ pleiades_rising, Livejournal

"I dunno. I'm sure Ryou could top someone. Like Yuugi, maybe. Or... puppies, or something like that. xD"
~ hales731

"Kaiba admitted he was wrong. And the world didn't suddenly end."
~ lil_bishie

"When the Nile fell through a plothole, it landed sideways. Hence: SOUTH BANK."
~ evilsimon

"Did 4Kids/FuniMation ever release tapes or DVD's of the Noa Arc? Because it seems to me that the dub dvds jump from the last duel on the Battle Ship straight to Battle Tower/Alcatraz: do not pass go, do not get diverted to virtual reality, do not see cool eps. of Kaiba whupping Goza's flaming virtual *ss and jumping off the top of the KC building with Yugi/Yami..."
~ not_hathor

"We fangirls know it's love, but Kaiba is so far back in the closet that he can see Narnia >__>"
~ star_sailor13

Thoughts on Kaiba's new coat in Yuugiou R:

"I actually happen to like the anti gravity look. It goes with the whole Kaiba 'Laws of nature? What laws of nature?' thing. Kaiba's too cool for physics."
~ shalilajupiter, Livejournal

"Do do do do inspector gadget do do do do do DO DOO!"
~ dark_pyre, Livejournal

"It looks like a tent...O.o I could LIVE in there! *plotbunny*"
~ irvys_sefie, Livejournal

"I don't like it. It covers his crotch."
~ orange_poptart, Livejournal

"But really, forget the coat. I want what's under the coat."
~ shalilajupiter, Livejournal

Quotes from domino_uni RPG:

(A quick explanation for those not familiar with Livejournal RPGs: The roleplayers make a journal for their character and post in it, which is why all the characters have screennames. A "mun" is a player, so "Yami-mun" would be the person who plays Yami. Anything enclosed in ((double parentheses)) is an out-of-character comment. And an NPC is a non-player character, someone who's not from the series.)

"...please tell me that you are not going to top yourself."
"...I don't think that's physically possible."
~ aussie_biker (Varon) / idonthaveityet (Yami)

"At least this explains why you're not interested in anyone at our uni."
"Yes, they're all idiots like you."
~ witchex (Rebecca) / linearlogic (Seto)

"Go away, world."
"I see your 'go away, world' and raise you 'apocalypse, come now!'."
~ grey_shade (Bakura) / linearlogic (Seto)

"...My ass is none of anyone else's business."
~ idonthaveityet (Yami)

"...I'd call you a knight in shining armour, but I doubt armour comes in your size."
~ darkreflected (Yami Malik), to idonthaveityet (Yami)

"You forgot to mention the compensation issue."
"Hey, it's your snake."
"And we're twins. What's your point?"
~ scarred_bronze (Marik) / darkreflected (Yami Malik)

"~~Mymodestyisnotcuteeither.~~"
~ idonthaveityet (Yami)

"And you don't have nightmares anymore to need me to cuddle you either."
~ linearlogic (Seto), to nkdigik (Noa)

"...Noa needs electronics, support, privacy, sleep, and food. In that order."
~ linearlogic (Seto)

"OOO-EEEE-OOOOOOOH!"
~ quietwatcher (Shaadi)

"((Bakura: I am GRASSHOPPER. *stares up in adoration*))"
~ grey_shade (Bakura-mun)

"And you're dead sexy. *purrs*"
"Go away."
~ rena_lime (NPC) / linearlogic (Seto)

"Besides, I did not slam the door on her, I shut it emphatically."
~ linearlogic (Seto)

"((... I so DID NOT just type the subject for this as 'E-Malik to Seto'... Most definitely not... *facepalm*))"
~ nkdigik (Noa-mun), in an entry titled "E-mail to Seto"

"Yes. A ticky box is replacing you. The truly frightening thing, however, is that it actually has more personality than you."
~ master_sigurd (Siegfried)

"((It's Seto. Great at online stuff, lousy at in-person things. Especially if you violate his personal space and try hitting on him. That just makes his programming skip into an infinite loop of 'WTF?!'))"
~ linearlogic (Seto-mun)

"I think I'll pass on the Kaiba thing. I'm pretty sure he eats kittens."
"Only if they're well-done. Really, what sort of barbarian do you take me for?"
~ hunkahunkaman (Honda) /linearlogic (Seto)

"...and it's not a reason to think that Jehanna might be 'crushing' on me because that kind of ~~wishful thinking~~ behavior is pathetic."
~ linearlogic (Seto)

"What am I, the local porn supplier?"
~ darkreflected (Yami Malik)

"Am now to all intents and purposes rather bored, and with an odd desire to play Internet Checkers. Hopefully, I will quash this geekery before it actualises itself."
~ grey_shade (Bakura)

"Oooo?"
~ quietwatcher (Shaadi)

"I am at your service for the purposes of transporting 'Godknowshowmany x tinsel' and all of the other dark side supplies whenever you're ready."
~ idonthaveityet (Yami), to aussie_biker (Varon)

"((Reposted to kill the typo =/))"
"((Reposted because CERTAIN GOLDFISHIES can't type and force others to delete their comments.))"
~ Titles of aussie_biker (Varon-mun) and idonthaveityet (Yami-mun)'s successive comments

"You don't blame a cup for being chipped, you blame the person that dropped it."
"Don't blame a cup for being chipped when someone drops it, fine, but don't blame someone for letting go when they're told to. You never dropped me."
~ linearlogic (Seto) / idonthaveityet (Yami)

"Absolute statements don't work."
"This statement is false. Just a little paradox."
"7AM and you pull a paradox on me. Why?"
"Because I like paradoxes, and 'Absolute statements don't work' demanded a response in kind. Tired?"
~ linearlogic (Seto) / idonthaveityet (Yami)

"...I rolled -10 for social skills, didn't I?"
~ linearlogic (Seto)

"What if it's a sort of lightning that follows you wherever you go, but you can momentarily escape by way of a cabinet?"
"Then I'd use my time in the cabinet to find a way to fight it."
~ idonthaveityet (Yami) / linearlogic (Seto)

"After seeing Isis comment, I realized that a full-fledged attack by Ishtar might shatter what tenuous threads button-boy has to sanity, so thought it would be best to prevent that."
~ linearlogic (Seto)

"Al;jklsjcfkldk FINALS. FUCK. *stresses*"
~ scarred_bronze (Marik)

[09:38:46 PM] Axerndel[64726163686500]: I would love a spaceship like that one. Or any spaceship at all, really.
[09:40:01 PM] Jehanna[731]: I have to agree. They're not exactly affordable, though they would be a great deal of fun.
[09:40:20 PM] Axerndel[64726163686500]: I'd probably waste it if I had one.
[09:47:37 PM] Axerndel[64726163686500]: I'd go to visit you instead of the stars.
~ Seto / Jehanna (kind-of NPC)

"Iamneverleavingmyroomagain."
~ linearlogic (Seto)

"I still fail to see why we didn't just figure out a way to pick the lock. The teacher is not Big Brother."
"I refuse to get into this argument again."
~ master_sigurd (Siegfried) / linearlogic (Seto)

"And did I commit genocide again?! Gosh."
~ lil_rocker (Mokuba)

While completing a quiz asking "Which of your friends is the _____?":
"038. Cutest? ~~Rebecca~~ Noa or Mokuba."
~ linearlogic (Seto)

"It's like he rolled +10 for Looks and -5 for Charm."
~ witchex (Rebecca), describing linearlogic (Seto) after her first encounter with him

"As to Australian wildlife, I think I like sugar gliders. They're like dormice, only jet-propelled."
~ idonthaveityet (Yami)

"1 x padded blue baby grow with feet (newborn size)
1 x baby gloves (newborn size)
1 x hat (newborn size)
Plus numerous 'Tsk, teenage father' looks."
~ aussie_biker (Varon)

"Hi! My name's Yuugi, Yuugi Mutou. I'm in the Gym too, so you've probably seen me, or at least my hair."
~ asobimasu (Yuugi)

"...Squiggly. For the love of..."
~ downthemiddle_ (Shaada)

"He'smakinglittleheartsatme."
~ idonthaveityet (Yami)

"And we do apologize when we're wrong. Fortunately, I am never wrong."
~ linearlogic (Seto)

"When'd you pick him up?"
"Last night. Call it a late birthday present."
~ aussie_biker (Varon) / idonthaveityet (Yami)

"Goldfish are clearly the great thinkers of this age."
~ dartz_sensei (Dartz)

"I'm in Seto, at the moment. Not terribly interesting, but it's enough to keep me awake."
~ idonthaveityet (Yami)

"I don't lose. I'm just...briefly not-winning."
~ idonthaveityet (Yami)

"*still hasn't broken 2000* :|"
"You are on the way to destruction? ;D"
"I have no chance to survive make my time. :|"
"Perhaps you should move 'Zig'."
"For great justice?"
"You know what you doing."
"Main screen turn on."
"... Alright, I've run out of Zero Wing quotes."
"I win. :D"
"At least you've beaten me at something today?"
"... Yeah. :|"
~ scarred_bronze (Marik) / grey_shade (Bakura)

DigiLightstar: ...OMFG.
DigiLightstar: The first four letters of hotcute = hotc = Heart of the Cards.
DigiLightstar: *dies*
DigiLightstar: Just felt like I should point that out. XDD
xRaventidex: ...*death*
DigiLightstar: This proves that Darksideshipping is canon? :D
xRaventidex: *DIES*
xRaventidex: XD Yes!
DigiLightstar: :DDD

At one time, the characters posted in their journals a meme asking "What would you do for me?" and presenting various options. darkreflected (Yami Malik) responded to everyone's posts saying he'd have sex with them. Various characters' responses:

"...Well aren't you pleasant."
~ nkdigik (Noa)

"Marik apparently has a thing for everyone."
~ linearlogic (Seto)

"Do I know you?"
~ master_sigurd (Siegfried)

Dueling Quotes:

xRaventidex: I think the Heart of the Cards is a girl.
DigiLightstar: XDD YES!!!
...
xRaventidex: I had 700 LP and Marcus had 8000 then the Heart of the Cards (I kid you NOT) gave me the cards I needed and I PWNED HIM.
DigiLightstar: XDDD
DigiLightstar: The Heart of the Cards is so totally real.
DigiLightstar: I can't explain some of my victories otherwise.

AmatsuMikaboshi8: Scared of my deck yet?
DigiLightstar: I fear no deck.
AmatsuMikaboshi8: Do you fear... Defeat?
DigiLightstar: Nope.
AmatsuMikaboshi8: Not even from a 2850 attacker?
DigiLightstar: ... *Blue-Eyes roars*
AmatsuMikaboshi8: ... Activate trap.
DigiLightstar: Not so fast, Kaiba.

<Game> DigiFaith has put down a Mystical Space Typhoon
<DigiFaith> Zap your face down
<Game> Vermillion Tiger put Mirror Force into the graveyard
<Game> DigiFaith put Mystical Space Typhoon into the graveyard
<DigiFaith> XDDD
<Vermillion Tiger> h8 u
<DigiFaith> I have Mirror-Force-detecting instincts.

xRaventidex: See? You just have to believe and you can overcome anything! 8D
DigiLightstar: XDD
DigiLightstar: Including Cyber End Dragons!!
xRaventidex: Yes!
xRaventidex: Especially those!
xRaventidex: Because you are the female Seto Kaiba!
xRaventidex: No one can defeat you!
DigiLightstar: *dies*

DigiLightstar: ;_; Kaibaman is too cool to be this useless.
DigiLightstar: (And I definitely did not just spell Kaibaman "Kaibamon.")
Nohbdy Ithirion: XD

xRaventidex: >_>
DigiLightstar: <_<
xRaventidex: >_>
DigiLightstar: <_<
xRaventidex: >_>
DigiLightstar: <_<
xRaventidex: >_>
DigiLightstar: <_<
xRaventidex: >_>
DigiLightstar: <_<
xRaventidex: >_>
xRaventidex: *helpmeeeeeeeee*
DigiLightstar: <_<
DigiLightstar: *sics Blue-Eyes on Marcus*
xRaventidex: >_>
xRaventidex: And. 8DDDDDD
DigiLightstar: XD
DigiLightstar: >_>
DigiLightstar: WAIT.
DigiLightstar: <_<
xRaventidex: >_>
DigiLightstar: <_<
xRaventidex: >_>
DigiLightstar: <_<
xRaventidex: >_>
DigiLightstar: <_<
xRaventidex: >_>
DigiLightstar: <_<
xRaventidex: >_>
DigiLightstar: <_<
xRaventidex: >_>
DigiLightstar: <_<
xRaventidex: >_>
DigiLightstar: <_<
xRaventidex: >_>
DigiLightstar: <_<
xRaventidex: >_>
DigiLightstar: <_<
xRaventidex: >_>
DigiLightstar: <_<
xRaventidex: >_>
DigiLightstar: <_<
xRaventidex: >_>
DigiLightstar: <_<
xRaventidex: >_>
DigiLightstar: <_<
xRaventidex: >_>
DigiLightstar: <_<
xRaventidex: >_>
DigiLightstar: <_<
xRaventidex: <_>
DigiLightstar: >_<
xRaventidex: <_>
DigiLightstar: >_<
xRaventidex: *snarlsnarlsnarlsnarl*
xRaventidex: <______________>
DigiLightstar: >__________<
xRaventidex: <__________>
DigiLightstar: >__________<
xRaventidex: <>_________<>
DigiLightstar: ><________><
DigiLightstar: Nohbdy Ithirion: XD
Nohbdy Ithirion: XDD
DigiLightstar: You are mean. :P
Nohbdy Ithirion: I know.
xRaventidex: ...he's a BITCH. >_<
DigiLightstar: >_<
xRaventidex: ...but you like him, still? 8D;
DigiLightstar: XD Yes.

Nohbdy Ithirion: :-D
Nohbdy Ithirion: You know what I wanting.
DigiLightstar: Gah. Not now.
Nohbdy Ithirion: Aww
...
Nohbdy Ithirion: You don't got 14 minutes right now you can waste? XD
DigiLightstar: XD No.
Nohbdy Ithirion: :-(
Nohbdy Ithirion: But, we haven't done it in like... forever?
DigiLightstar: XD This is the most easily misinterpreted conversation I've ever had.
...
Nohbdy Ithirion: *Intimidates you with my rugged good looks?*
DigiLightstar: XD Still no.

<Game> DigiFaith drew a card
<DigiFaith> w00t.
<Nohbdy> Eep
<DigiFaith> Ph33r...
<Game> DigiFaith has put down a Winged Kuriboh
<Nohbdy> Where's my white flag?!
<Nohbdy> ... This is humiliating.
<DigiFaith> XDDD
<Game> DigiFaith's Blue-Eyes White Dragon is attacking Cybernetic Magician
<Game> Nohbdy put Cybernetic Magician into the graveyard
<Game> Nohbdy loses 500 LP (300 LP)
<Game> Nohbdy loses 100 LP (200 LP)
<Game> DigiFaith's Winged Kuriboh is attacking opponent's LP
<Game> Nohbdy loses 200 LP (0 LP)
<Game> Nohbdy loses 100 LP (-100 LP)
<Game> Nohbdy drew a card
<DigiFaith> *hugs Kuribo*

After Marcus summons Gilford the Lightning:
DigiLightstar: ...Crap.
xRaventidex: ...CRAP?!
DigiLightstar: XDD
xRaventidex: YOU UNDERSTATE. DDDDDDD8

<Nohbdy> OBAKA DESU.
<Goldfishy> Don't call me an idiot.
...
DigiLightstar: He called himself an idiot.
xRaventidex: ...XDDDDDDDDDDD
xRaventidex: I SUCK.
DigiLightstar: XDD

DigiLightstar: I shall teach you to ph33r my deck.
DigiLightstar: Seriously.
DigiLightstar: It pwns.
TrueTigerSoul: We shall see, dracophile!
DigiLightstar: XDDDD
DigiLightstar: "Dracophile."
DigiLightstar: That sounds so wrong.

<Game> Nohbdy has put down a Swords of Revealing Light
<Game> Nohbdy is done with their turn
<DigiFaith> ;_;
<DigiFaith> That is so my card.
<Game> DigiFaith drew a card
<DigiFaith> ...Ooh.
<Game> DigiFaith has put down a Heavy Storm
<Nohbdy> Oh no.
<Game> Nohbdy put Swords of Revealing Light into the graveyard
<DigiFaith> Now THAT was Heart of the Cards.
<Nohbdy> ;_;

DigiLightstar: XDD I sign on, and within five seconds, three people IM me about dueling.

Yu-Gi-Oh Mysteries (taken from Let's Have Some Fun with Yu-Gi-Oh):

What is with Kaiba's trenchcoat? It defies gravity!
Does anyone else notice that it's strange that Bakura wears those tight pants, has a saucy accent, and grows sort of horned with his hair whenever he sees Mokuba?
Why does no one ever notice when Yuugi goes through puberty in 10 seconds?
Why was the Doppleganger scene in Yuugi vs. Pegasus so incredibly cool? It boggles the mind.
Does Mako realize that things kind of fall off sometimes when 120 mph winds are hitting a ship and water is covering it completely?
Why does the voice actor of Brock from the Pokemon Anime keep popping up in Yu-Gi-Oh? I don't wanna hear him, damnit!
Wouldn't you love to have a voice like Yami Bakura? (I can hella impersonate him, but it's not a natural thing)
When will they come up with "Gaia, The Overly Talented Warrior With Little Importance"?
Why does Joey use a freaking Battle Warrior?!?! (700/1000... Omg. Best card ever.)
Why does Weevil Underwood's voice sound like that? Listening to him talk for 3 minutes is enough to make you want to rip your hair out of your head and eat it with a side of horseradish. He sounds like a vampire on helium! And that laugh...
How did Mokuba get all his hair into that ski cap without making it appear even a hint larger than its normal size?
How does Bakura walk in those pants?
Why is Kaiba a High School student? He looks like he's 30! Someone been held back a few times to many?
Wouldn't it be cool to Trap people in cards? ... "Nobody move! This is a robbery!" - "I don't think so!" *schwing* ::bright light::
Did anyone else not understand that episode where Kaiba's evil side came back as a clown...at all?
Why does the Celtic Guardian sound like a cow? ... "Go! Celtic Guardian!" - "Moooooo!"
Why does Celtic Guardian seem like he will someday just say "F*** You" to Yuugi? (Example: I can't do it...Celtic Guardian stop the attack on Kaiba...I don't feel like winning)
Why didn't Upper Deck aid my humanitarian sensitive ears by changing Man Eater Bug to Person Eater Bug? Feminists take over again?
How in blazes did the Millenium Ring get back on Bakura after it was chucked by Tristan?
Why did I make a paper and index card imitation duel disk?
Am I going to be there when Yuugi finally flips from Tea's whining, Joey's accent, and Tristan's lack of importance, and proceeds to banish them all to the Shadow Realm?
Don't you want Mokuba's mad "taking down the Roba family" skillz? I know I do.
I wonder how many looks Mako gets from anyone within earshot of his melodramtic lines.
Who would win in a game of cards, any of Yuugi's group, or the Digimon Tamers?
With all these dog references you would think at least some of them would be aimed at Tea. She is, after all, Yami's *cough cough cough*

Things You'll Never Hear on Yu-Gi-Oh (taken from Let's Have Sone Fun with Yu-Gi-Oh):

Yuugi: "Screw the Dark Magician, I want to win!"
Kaiba: "I forfeit."
Joey: "I love hot dogs."
Pegasus: *Daffy Duck style* "WOO-HOO, WOO-HOO, WOO-HOO, WOO-HOO!"
Joey: *Yuugi slaps a card onto duel disk. A giant holographic facedown card appears. Tristan runs into it and get slammed onto the ground.* "Told ya they were solid."
Kaiba: "You guys are my best friends ever."
Pegasus: "I give up on Cecilia! I want you, Tea!!"
Joey: "I just got accepted to M.I.T!!"
Yuugi: "Sorry, I can't duel, have to get to school."
Yami Bakura: "WHAT!? What kind of Nazi censorship #### is this!? How can I look evil and sexy to all of my fans out there with the freaking word FINAL being spelled out over my head? Ah screw this. I quit. I wonder if Disney is hiring ..."

Yu-Gi-Oh Homework Excuses (compiled from Janime's forum):

Yuugi: My Kuribo ate it.
Kaiba: I think I did my homework *secretly slides a $10,000 check*
Yami: What's a "homework"?
Marik: My dark side sent it to the Shadow Realm...
Yuugi: My friends weren't there to support me, so I couldn't do it.
Kaiba: You should feel honoured that I, Kaiba Seto, have chosen not to do your homework.
Mokuba: Nii-sama said I didn't have to. He said that if you give me detention he'll have you shot.
Yami: Is that some sort of duel?
Joey: I handed it to the wrong teacher.
Pegasus: My toons stole it.
Odion: I got struck by lightning and was unconscious till after the due date.
Pegasus: I was too busy reading my comics and drinking wine to care.
Joey: The wind blew it out of my hand while I was on top of a blimp.
Yami Bakura: I ate it.. got a problem with that?
^ Ryou: Bakura got hungry.
Yuugi: It got stuck in my hair... It still is...
Anzu: Friends don't give out homework!
Marik: This homework is rightfully mine!! (DF: w00 for dub-bashing)
Otogi: I was low on dice to flick at people, so I folded it into a dice...
Kaiba: My dog ate it... *watches as Jounouchi chews on his work files*
Mai: Oops! Was that my homework I used to stuff?!
Mokuba: Nii-sama says that homework is to be done at home. But I wasn't at home! I was eating chocolate and cotton candy in nii-sama's office so it would be wrong to do homework! (DF: Smart kid.)
Kaiba: I put it in my coat and now I can't find it.
Joey: Did I mention you look pretty today...
Yuugi: *watery, puppy eyes activate* I w-worked really h-hard, b-but I-I-I lost it. *sniffles*
Kaiba: It insulted my intelligence.
Yami Bakura: I was trying to make my pen work and it wouldn't, so I sent it to the Shadow Realm and didn't have a spare to write my homework with.
Yami: I gave it to Yuugi to hand in.
^ Yuugi: ...I thought Yami had it.
Panik: The sheet of paper was too bright.
Marik: My yami passed out because he drank Windex again, it took all night to wake him up.
Ishizu: You see, I had forseen that my paper would get lost, so I put it in a safe place but now I forget where...
Kaiba: ...You're fired!!
Rare Hunter: Master Marik made me forget it... Wait... forget what?
Kaiba: That's private KaibaCorp business. If I told you, I'd have to kill you.
Yuugi: *is being pushed down and tied to a stretcher* But my other personality really DID sacrifice it to Ra!
Yami Malik: *licking a dagger* Come again?
Yami: I would have done my homework... but I got stuck on the first question. You know, the one that says "Name:"...
Yuugi: You know, my hair is REALLY stiff. And the paper is REALLY thin. And we all know how clumsy I am...
Mokuba: Wait... I have to go to school?
Kaiba: Homework? I have to do homework? I'm the one who's funding this school! Don't tell me to do homework...
Yami: Kuriboh, negate my F!!!
Mako: It got wet...Do you still want it?
Theif Bakura: ....Somebody stole it from me?
Ishizu: I foresaw myself not doing it, so I didn't do it.
Pegasus: My Millennium Eye could search your pathetic brain for all the answers... Ha ha ha ha!
Akunadin: I sacraficed it at Kuruelna village... It was an evil soul!
Shadi: Just let me go back and search the minds/souls of all the people whose minds/souls I've gone into and I'm sure I'll be able to find it, eventually.
Yami: I forgot which of my soul room rooms I put it in.
Odion: I gave it to my master to make it a mindslave of his own... Must... honor... master... Malik! *passes out on the floor*
Akunadin: It said my son would not become king so I burnt it.
Seto: I decided not to. Got a problem?
Marik: The homework made me angry causing my darkness to be released and take over my body again. He killed five people, blew up an orphanage, and tore some tags off of mattresses at the store before I was finally able to regain control. Needless to say I ended up spending the night in jail and couldn't do my homework.
Mana: I tried doing my homework but accidentally blew it up. *pulls out a book of spells* Don't worry, I think I can get it back! *ends up blowing up teacher's desk*
Atem: I did my homework. I gave it to Shimon hours ago and he should have it finished by now.
Yami Bakura: *hands in seven stolen book reports*

Best Yu-Gi-Oh Moments (by DF):

The Dragon Master Knight
Seto helping Yuugi defeat his ghost-slash-evil-half thing
Mokuba's ski cap
Yami in the Panik episode
Mai giving Joey her Glory card
How Yami beats Pegasus after Yuugi "dies"
Seto and Mokuba's reunion
Seto's face in the flashing lights in that elevator on Noa's mobile fortress
Yuugi and Joey's "daisuki" scene (the Japanese one, not the screwed-up dub version)
Seto saving Tea
Mokuba and the Roba family, and Mokuba's face when he turns to look at Yami
Yami looking out the window when he, Seto, and Mokuba are in the helicopter
Seto talking to his computer in the ghost-slash-evil-half episodes
Pegasus' "fruit punch"
Joey trying to save Mai from Ra
Yami saving Joey and Mai from Ra
Yami Malik's dagger-Rod
Seto sacrificing Obelisk to summon his Blue-Eyes
When Seto draws and plays his Blue-Eyes in the Champion vs. Creator duel without even looking
The Celtic Guardian slashing Yami in his duel with Gansley
Crump and his penguin issues
Tea hugging Yuugi after he saved her from Crump
Seto taking on Big-5-Tristan with that piece of pipe or whatever it was
How they tried to make it seem like Pegasus wasn't dead and Mokuba wasn't unconscious
Noa's puppy
Seto and Mokuba being turned into stone
Yami and Yuugi's spirit room with all their friends
Seto and Mokuba being released from stone
All of the flashbacks in the Virtual World arc
Seto and Yami dueling together against Dartz
Yami running to Seto after Dartz defeats him
Yami and that dark serpent thing at the end of the Doom saga
Yuugi and Yami walking into the light with their arms around each other
Yami's "psychic message" to Pegasus after defeating Seto's evil half
Seto giving Yuugi the victory sign before flying away in his Blue-Eyes jet
Yuugi to Rebecca: "And I'm not yelling!!"
Yami's "date" with Tea
The badly, badly edited story of Marik's father's death
Joey tied to the chair yelling at Odion without even thinking about what Odion could do to him if he gets pissed off
Tea yelling at Seto after the BEUD duel, and then again for not letting them help him find Mokuba
Seto's Blue-Eyes destroying Lechter's Satellite Cannon (They edited that too!! *cries*)
The Fairy Lily's "crayon"
Yuugi to Joey: "Are you sure we should cook the candy bars?"
Yuugi crying when he won his Duelist Kingdom duel against Joey
Yami: "Wha- Yuugi! You can't- This isn't a duel!!"
Mokuba throwing the flowers out of the jet
Yami Bakura ripping open his shirt to reveal the Millennium Ring
Seto drawing a card with his eyes closed, then just barely opening one eye to see that it's the card he needs
The incredible irony that Seto's now in the exact same position he put Yuugi in during the BEUD duel - risking someone's life to win a duel - yet Yuugi, instead of gloating about it, still helps him out as much as he can
How they completely screwed up Noa's Creation Deck and the seven turns thing
Yami's Puzzle protecting him from the Orichalcos Seal in his duel with Dartz
Future great moment: When Yami's name is finally released in the anime and we find out whether it's Atem or Atemu
Seto in the Overlap video (O_O)
Atem on the horse in the Overlap video (Did they even have horses in ancient Egypt?)
Yami Bakura in his Battle City duel against Bonz (O_O')
Pegasus and the Doppleganger
Marik putting his hand over his deck to surrender to Yami in the BC final duel
Odion's scorpion-monster that DIDN'T eat Joey's monsters (Riiiiight...)
Joey in the dog costume
Tristan's Great Outdoors Wilderness Survival Guide
That cool shot of Yami in front of the Dungeon Dice magic crest (The real magic crest, not that crappy-looking star they edited into the episode after its first showing [Why did they do that? The original crests look so much better, and the new ones don't make any sense.])
Pegasus sitting among all his paintings and crying for Cecelia
Yami summoning Slypher for the first time
Yami Bakura realizing that, at least a little bit, he cares for Ryou (I refuse to believe that he saved him only because he "needs his body.")
Odion to Joey: "It looks like you made it all the way to the Battle City finals just to lose ON YOUR KNEES!!" (For a character with very few significant speaking parts, Odion has some awesome lines. Or maybe his voice actor's just good. Or both.)

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